Ten Players I Won’t Be Drafting

I felt like making some draft #content today, so here’s a fun list of players I’m fairly sure I like less than the consensus. Maybe everyone hates them? Maybe I’m crazy and am the only one? Maybe this is propaganda? Who knows.

1. Ed Howard- The classic ‘glove first prospect’ where every scouting report you read about Howard talks about his bat like parents talk about their least favorite child. Lots of qualified hopes and some feinting optimism, but also noting that the realistic bar is set very low.
2. Pete Crow-Armstrong- PCA is similar to Howard in that we know he’ll be fine defensively in MLB, but with the reality that even if he does hit, it’ll be because of his speed, and probably not any kind of actual hitting acumen. He could very well be the one on this list that makes a fool of me if he magically gains a plus bat to go with his blazing speed, but I think it’s safe to say he won’t turn into Mike Trout Lite, either.
3. Bryce Jarvis- This pick by the D-backs seem hilariously sad at this point. “Hey, this guy was great for a month at the end of a shitty college career, maybe he’s really go…Oops, he’s already back to shitty at Instructs. Welp.” Sure, every pitcher is moldable clay, but when you hear about how bad a recent draft pick scuffled by the typically rosy Baseball America handbook, it’s, uh, not good.
4. Nick Loftin- This guy I’m sure some folks like, and that’s ok! I’m just not big on ‘Sum is greater than the parts’ types, and that’s probably well known, and has probably also bit me in the ass before. Maybe he’s boring, maybe he’s overall solid and I’m just too in love with loud tools? We all have our fetishes, leave my Brazilian Fart Porn out of this.
5. Dillon Dingler– First things first, this is a 70 grade name, at least. But when you’re lauded as a great defensive catcher but also labeled an ‘ambush hitter’ I think most fantasy folks will likely move on to a less interesting name, but probably more interesting prospect.
6. Freddy Zamora- “Hey, this guy can be great defensively at short, except for uh, the times where he wasn’t.” is confusing enough, then you throw in that he was a ‘steady hitter who sees the zone well’ and I’m thoroughly unimpressed. You know who else sees the zone well? Me. And lots of other people with good vision that aren’t good hitters.
7. Armando Cruz- This is just obliterating low-hanging fruit, but a J2 that’s known for his glove and teams/scouts were just hoping he could *maybe* hit his way out of a wet paper bag eventually isn’t really my jam. But hey, if someone takes a shot on him having an Ozzie Smith type career, I ain’t mad atcha.
8. Christian Roa– Being a boring pitching prospect is fine, but when you’re a righthander barely tickling the low 90’s and your secondaries are just kinda good maybe, I have to draw the line somewhere. You could at least spice things up a bit by throwing a Knuckle Curve, Splitter, Palmball or something fun like that.
9. Jared Jones- This is probably less about Jones, but more about all the goddamn High School pitchers that pump high 90’s heat, have a slider that *might* be good, and have never heard of a changeup, in addition to barely being able to find the strikezone with GPS and a service dog. I will probably draft someone roughly fitting this description on draft day, because let’s face it, realistically everyone will at some point.
10. Alerick Soularie– Soularie is at least interesting, I’ll give him that. Supposedly he stands hunched over at the plate like hitters from the 70’s, just without the cigarette hanging out of his mouth. He might have a little power, might have a little speed, but likely won’t get to use either. Also interesting, the Twins were like ‘Hey, you aren’t super awesome in the outfield, let’s move you up the defensive spectrum.’